The short answer is, Love means everything to me. It means Life. It means Health. It means Vitality. It means Freedom and Joy and Happiness and Safety and Self Expression. It means the highest forms of Being, Doing and Having possible and available to me and the entire Human Race.
It also means Romance. It means Sex. It means Friendship and Camaraderie and Partnership and Humanitarianism and World Peace.
On a deeper level, Love is Who I Am and Who I Be; who I’m being. To me, Love is a created phenomenon. It’s a choice. I choose to Love and be Loved. I choose to give and receive Love. I choose who, what, when, where, how and why to Love.
It is my responsibility to Love and be Loved.
I wake up every day and go to bed every night with the absolute intention of choosing Love. However, when undesirable incidents occur during my day, I don’t always stay “In Love” but I keep choosing to remember what I’m committed to.
One of my pet peeves is clogged aisles in a store by customers so absorbed by what they’re pondering I have to walk down another aisle to get what I want. I dislike that because if that was me I would move for them - they ain’t fair!
Another one is when I’m carrying a cold drink and the slow person in front of me at the cash register hogs up the entire counter so I can’t put my drink down while waiting for them to finish. My hands get colder - I really, really dislike that!
But I’m not committed to making people wrong because there’s no Love in it.
In those moments, I forget I CAN Love that they’re in that aisle falling in Love with what they’re paying attention to. I forget that I CAN Love their ability to focus. I forget that I CAN Love how they can afford to shop at that store. I forget that I CAN Love how they take care of their well being.
I have to remind myself to ask this simple question: What could I find in this situation to authentically Love - right here, right now?
It’s amazing how the brain finds answers to any question we give it.
I can Love my family. I can Love strangers. I can Love people I don’t know. I can Love people that dislike me. I can Love my foibles and weaknesses.
I can Love you.
And, I do.
Because I choose to.
Who needs chemistry?
Showing posts with label freedom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label freedom. Show all posts
Monday, April 14, 2008
Why Look at Life with Eyes of Love?
What kind of question is that?
Well, it’s the kind of question one would ask if they were committed to a life of personal happiness, fulfillment, freedom, joy - every feeling, experience and result they’ve always wanted. It’s the kind of question that has one be the author of their life rather than a victim of other people, circumstances or the world at large. It’s the kind of question someone would ask if they ever thought, “If life isn’t working for every single person, then how can life be working for me, really?”
Think about it - if my life is working but yours is not, I don’t have access to the benefit of your blessings and gifts and neither do you.
We have no idea how far along the Human Race could be if we had a culture where everyone wins or no one wins.
If I’m happy and you’re not I have 3 choices: help you be happy, leave you alone in your unhappiness or join you in being unhappy. If you can think of any other options let me know.
Here’s what I do know: only 1 of those options works for us both.
What does the question, “Why look at life with eyes of Love” mean?
It means looking for and seeing the love in every person, place, thing and especially every experience. It means consciously listening for the Love in every aspect of Life with our mind rather than just our ears. It means creating Love rather than waiting for Love to “descend” upon or “happen” to us. It means relating to “Love” as a Verb rather than an Adjective.
When I allow the people in my life to upset me, when I get disappointed by what they do or feel hurt by what just happened, I ask myself, “What’s great about what just happened?” or “What must that person be thinking that would make what they just did OK with them?”
I find that when I get annoyed by what people do, that person is either doing something I do and hate or they just gave me an opportunity to develop my patience and generosity further. When I take my attention off my feelings and look at the situation impersonally, I can see how I MIGHT (not definitely) benefit from what happened. It may be an opportunity for me to grow, be an example for that person to emulate or even to take care of them.
Those are things I can Love and things I can be thankful they provided me with.
When I view situations that way and respond appropriately, the person almost always appreciates that I was thoughtful and created a way for us both to benefit from being there together - in spite of what just happened. We can both experience Love for ourselves and each other.
For example, if someone keeps breaking promises, instead of reacting, I could have a conversation to find out why and give them an opportunity to speak their truth completely even if I don’t like what they say. I may find that I don’t speak clearly enough or there’s something going on in their life that’s so upsetting they can’t remember anything 5 minutes after it’s been said. Maybe they’re angry with me from something I did and I didn’t know it.
This is GREAT NEWS!! I’ve been given something that I can create Love and Appreciation with with that other person. I can take away both their upset and mine. All there is for me to do is find a solution so I can get what I want done. Or, I’ll know they can’t fulfill my request so I’ll stop asking them to do it. Either way I’ll both feel a lot better and be free of that upset from that point forward.
Looking for the benefit in an upsetting situation, not taking things personally, standing in another person’s shoes, listening to them fully, creating win-win solutions based on what was communicated and acknowledging them for giving their best is an excellent recipe for turning upsets into Loving moments.
When people discover their power to make any situation loving, they don’t want to waste their time living any other way.
Well, it’s the kind of question one would ask if they were committed to a life of personal happiness, fulfillment, freedom, joy - every feeling, experience and result they’ve always wanted. It’s the kind of question that has one be the author of their life rather than a victim of other people, circumstances or the world at large. It’s the kind of question someone would ask if they ever thought, “If life isn’t working for every single person, then how can life be working for me, really?”
Think about it - if my life is working but yours is not, I don’t have access to the benefit of your blessings and gifts and neither do you.
We have no idea how far along the Human Race could be if we had a culture where everyone wins or no one wins.
If I’m happy and you’re not I have 3 choices: help you be happy, leave you alone in your unhappiness or join you in being unhappy. If you can think of any other options let me know.
Here’s what I do know: only 1 of those options works for us both.
What does the question, “Why look at life with eyes of Love” mean?
It means looking for and seeing the love in every person, place, thing and especially every experience. It means consciously listening for the Love in every aspect of Life with our mind rather than just our ears. It means creating Love rather than waiting for Love to “descend” upon or “happen” to us. It means relating to “Love” as a Verb rather than an Adjective.
When I allow the people in my life to upset me, when I get disappointed by what they do or feel hurt by what just happened, I ask myself, “What’s great about what just happened?” or “What must that person be thinking that would make what they just did OK with them?”
I find that when I get annoyed by what people do, that person is either doing something I do and hate or they just gave me an opportunity to develop my patience and generosity further. When I take my attention off my feelings and look at the situation impersonally, I can see how I MIGHT (not definitely) benefit from what happened. It may be an opportunity for me to grow, be an example for that person to emulate or even to take care of them.
Those are things I can Love and things I can be thankful they provided me with.
When I view situations that way and respond appropriately, the person almost always appreciates that I was thoughtful and created a way for us both to benefit from being there together - in spite of what just happened. We can both experience Love for ourselves and each other.
For example, if someone keeps breaking promises, instead of reacting, I could have a conversation to find out why and give them an opportunity to speak their truth completely even if I don’t like what they say. I may find that I don’t speak clearly enough or there’s something going on in their life that’s so upsetting they can’t remember anything 5 minutes after it’s been said. Maybe they’re angry with me from something I did and I didn’t know it.
This is GREAT NEWS!! I’ve been given something that I can create Love and Appreciation with with that other person. I can take away both their upset and mine. All there is for me to do is find a solution so I can get what I want done. Or, I’ll know they can’t fulfill my request so I’ll stop asking them to do it. Either way I’ll both feel a lot better and be free of that upset from that point forward.
Looking for the benefit in an upsetting situation, not taking things personally, standing in another person’s shoes, listening to them fully, creating win-win solutions based on what was communicated and acknowledging them for giving their best is an excellent recipe for turning upsets into Loving moments.
When people discover their power to make any situation loving, they don’t want to waste their time living any other way.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
